How To Tolerate Uncertainty

Do we need to know EVERYTHING about events that haven’t happened yet?

One of the hardest things we have to deal with, when we struggle with Anxiety, is uncertainty of life. In other words, the fear of ‘tomorrow’ (or even the next hour, next few hours etc).

Life’s transitions are hard enough without the extra Anxiety thrown in.

Yet life’s transitions are inevitable (and also important).

Imagine just staying in your ‘safety bubble’ for years, trying not to make your Anxiety worse.

Imagine things you’d miss out on. 

We need to try new things. We need to gain valuable life experiences.

So what can you do to help yourself to cope with life’s uncertainties better?

If you feel you need to be ‘prepared’ and ‘have control’ over things that haven’t happened yet, ask yourself these simple questions:

  • Can you be absolutely, 100% certain about everything in life?

  • What are the advantages of needing certainty in life?

  • How has needing certainty in life been helpful to you?

  • What are the disadvantages of needing certainty in life?

  • How has needing certainty in life been unhelpful to you, or even detrimental to your life?

  • Do you tend to predict that something bad will happen, just because you are uncertain? Is this a reasonable thing to do? Could something good or neutral be just as likely to happen?

  • Are there some uncertainties in your life that you can live with? How do you do this? Can you do the same thing in situations where you have difficulty tolerating uncertainty?

Chances are, by answering these questions you may have discovered that needing ‘certainty’ over future events may not have been very useful, or helpful to you at all.

Talk to the people you know. How do they cope with the uncertainty and unpredictability of life? Could you do the same thing they do in situations where you have difficulty tolerating uncertainty?

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Increase your worry awareness.  

Start with learning all about Worry and how it affects your life. Learn the difference between Solvable and Unsolvable worries.

My workshop on *Understanding Worry* will explain it all:

Don’t respond to the need for certainty.

Now, this is a tough one. Learning how not give in to the need to ‘control’ will cause initial distress to the sufferers.

What can you do, or tell yourself, to help you cope with not responding to your need?

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Be focused on the present.

Here, our wonderful mindfulness techniques come to practice.

Download your free copy here:

Learn Three Immediate Anxiety Relief Techniques That You Can Implement Into Your Life Right Now

*Free Immediate Access. The workbook Includes Focus Awareness (Mindfulness), Breathing Techniques & Negative Self-Labelling Impact*

Deal with a wondering mind.

Yes, our minds are sneaky things- they wonder. After all, they’ve wondered for years- why stop now?

What can you tell yourself to help you when your mind wanders back to needing certainty?

Here are my further self-help tips on learning how to cope with uncertainties of life:

1. Think of each situation (life’s transition) as an opportunity to see something new and try something new. Rather than being negative about it (oh, this is awful), try to be realistic: ‘Yes, it may not work out for me, but I won’t know until I try. It could also be just the thing I need.’

2. Remember not to worry about things you can’t do anything about, because you have no way of knowing whether they will even happen (again, my worry workshop will come in handy here).

Only deal with things that do happen and have that trust in yourself that YOU WILL BE ABLE TO COPE WITH WHATEVER LIFE THROWS AT YOU (my problem-solving kit may come in handy here- download yours here). 

3. If something isn’t working for you, YOU CAN ALWAYS CHANGE IT. Have that trust in yourself.

4. Work on your problem-solving skills. Correct problem solving is mega important when we struggle with Anxiety, as even the simplest things in life (like deciding between a coffee or a tea) can be difficult when we struggle with Anxiety.

Grab your *6-Step Problem Solving Kit* here:

Download your *6 Step Problem-Solving Kit*:

To sum up my article:

Tolerating uncertainty and expected distress is no easy task, if this is how you’ve been ‘preparing for every eventuality’ for years.

If you feel your worrying is out of control, and severely impacts your quality of life, please do get in touch.

CBT Therapy, coupled with Coaching and Mindfulness, will deliver:

  1. Understanding WHY you do things you do;

  2. New skills and techniques to help you live healthier, happier life (let’s face it, constant ‘preparations’ and ‘scanning for future threats’ is no esy task);

  3. Ability to live in, and enjoy, ‘present’;

  4. And much more.

*Mastery Of Worry* Program

Book Complimentary Consultation if you need support with Anxiety, Worry & Tolerating Uncertainty:

*Clients outside of the UK, please state your full telephone number, including country code, thank you.

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